By guest contributor, Alice Jonas.
When considering bullying, the preschool years aren’t usually the first thing to come to mind. The junior high years are notorious for bullying, and cyberbullying throughout the teen years is much talked about these days. You might even think about workplace bullying before you contemplate kids under the age of five. However, preschool bullying is a sad reality, and one with highly detrimental effects.
Learn how to recognize preschool bullying and nip it in the bud — whether your child is the one on the receiving or delivering end of the equation.
Identify Bullying Behavior Early
It’s difficult to look into the eyes of a preschooler and see anything other than a young child who is essentially innocent, lacking the understanding of how actions affect others, and incapable of being deliberately cruel. However, as The Melissa Institute explains, how a child acts in preschool can set the stage for a future of bullying. Described as “pre-bullying” behaviors, things like overpowering another child to play with a particular toy, name-calling, and ostracizing are all precursors to bullying in later years. And while children are certainly resilient, it can be quite painful and detrimental for the kids on the receiving end.
Work Together With Your Community
The bullying dynamic is broader than just the bullier and the child being bullied. Beyond the child being bullied, there are the bullies, their henchmen, passive supporters, onlookers, potential defenders, and actual defenders. Everyone is affected and involved; those kids who aren’t actively bullying or protecting might be acting out of fear, they might experience guilt, and sometimes they feel powerless to act in another way.
It’s also important to recognize that there is no one adult party responsible for addressing bullying. Whether families bring an issue to their preschool out of concern or the school happens to witness an incident, when families and educators work together as a team, everyone is set up for success.
Set Boundaries and Offer Positive Reinforcement
Children who are involved with bullying need several things from their parents, caregivers, and the preschool. First and foremost, both the children being bullied and those doing the bullying benefit from established boundaries — as do the kids in more passive roles. Per Hartstein Psychological, the key is to set boundaries that are simple, clear, concise, and positive. And when adults witness the right behavior, they should make it a point to reinforce it with praise.
Start at Home
There are several ways caregivers can help their children, beginning with the physical environment. Kids benefit from having their own space at home where they can learn and play. By having a creative area, they can express themselves, sort ideas and emotions, and learn valuable lessons like organization and self-discipline. If square footage is tight, consider giving your child their own desk or nook with a few educational toys, books, puzzles and drawing materials where they can express themselves freely and independently.
Beyond the physical space, both bullies and children being bullied can benefit from changes in the home’s atmosphere. Engaging with kids, giving them clear boundaries, reducing stress levels, and simply listening to kids can be good for their self-esteem, help them recover from being bullied, and discourage bullying behavior. Ensure your home is a sanctuary for your child, with straightforward communication, understanding, and appropriate reinforcement. Families that are struggling might also wish to talk with a counselor for pointers on making their plan a reality.
If your child is being bullied or is bullying, the time to respond is now. Connect with your preschool to come up with a game plan. By acting as a team, you can put an end to bullying and provide your children with the tools necessary to thrive.
Creative Play School has provided quality child care and preschool education for over 40 years. To ensure your child has a healthy, well-rounded foundation, call 703-836-7090.